Even if the Morrow is Barren of Promises...

Today I lost myself to the tale of LOVELESS. You probably haven't heard of it. It's from a video game (FFVII:Crisis Core, on PSP). I kind of wish it were a proper story; I feel as though it has a lot of potential. Three friends looking for the greatest treasure in the world. One gets lost along the way. One must sacrifice the last. The whole tale is rather fascinating, in my opinion, but I guess unless you're are very familiar with it then it doesn't mean much.

I didn't chat with him as much today. He had a busy day travelling and meeting with friends. It was funny, when he got back around 10:45pm-ish he immediately wanted to start chatting, and then when 2am rolled around he didn't want to head our separate ways. He even sent me virtual flowers. Ok, so a picture of flowers, with the comment "Better if they were physical flowers, but this'll have to do for now". I want to find that charming, attractive, or dare I say cute. But the fear is kicking in. Fear of getting attached only to have him disappear from my life like the rest of them, one of whom disappeared quite literally. Fear of getting close only to have him hate me out of nowhere like all of my friends inevitably seem to do. Fear of actually being optimistic and hopeful, because inevitably I get devastated. I want to bring up the subject with him, but... I guess the fear is in the way. I did notice, though, he started making these comments after I mentioned my most recent failed attempt at dating.

I stopped by a book store today and picked up an interesting looking book. "Kill Baxter", by Charlie Human. I think it's a sequel, but they didn't have the first one. That won't stop me! haha. I'm a couple chapters in already and am enjoying the main character's voice. Sarcastic and bitter, with a hint of jaded, talking about how he saves the world, and no one cares. Not a single person has even said thanks. The setup so far is intriguing, and I look forward to reading more.

I also obtained a tiny desktop terrarium. It's nothing fancy, but I thought it was cute. I have been looking for a plant to grow on my sill, but since I never get direct sunlight nothing much will grow. A terrarium seemed rather promising, plus the woodland creatures are cute.

I spent some time with Dragon Age girl today. She wanted to hang out, so she went with me to the bookstore, then played Witcher 3 on my PS4 for a bit. It was nice to actually interact with someone in person for a bit, even if she only ever seems to want to talk about Dragon Age.

Anyway, that was my day in a nutshell. I'm rather tired, and once again up 4 hours later than planned. Tomorrow I will definitely get to bed on time!

-N.E.

Pondering Sunday

Today was mostly uneventful. Though, I guess for a Sunday it was pretty busy. Woke up to a lovely fire alarm around 7am, which thankfully turned out to be false. Spent most of my day lounging and cleaning up my half of the apartment. I'm starting to think the other girl on this half of the apartment isn't going to move back in. She is out for medical reasons, and her stuff is pretty much everywhere on the half that we share. It's peaceful having an entire half to myself, though, so I'm not complaining~

I went to run errands around 5pm and ran into a friend who was also running errands with 2 of her friends. The other two seemed to just want to bicker, so we pretty much just went our way and did what we needed to do.

While I was out I picked up some single-serve graham pie crusts and pudding, so I will make myself some dessert this week. I also need to swing by the liquor store and get some vodka to make jello shots. Because why not. I've needed to unwind lately, and just a couple shots is perfect to take the edge off after a long day. For me, at least. Plus, I can "CHEERS!" with my guys on PS4. I mostly play Destiny with them, and they like to drink while we play at night. Having nothing here, I've just been "CHEERS"ing with my Sunny D, hahaha.

I'm getting to know my brands of air freshener pretty well, these last few weeks. My roommates and I don't interact much (I was a late addition and tend to keep to myself), but the only real down side I have found to living with them is that they aren't terribly great at cooking. They try to make seafood for dinner almost every night, and every time they just burn it...

Once I returned from errands, I did some homework. Nothing exciting, I can assure you. I didn't spend much of any time today on recreation, or even in talking with the guy. He seemed like he wanted to, but I had stuff to do, and for some reason his eagerness to chat... I guess it made me nervous. Not the good nervous, like butterflies or whatever. The kind where I'm not supposed to get attached ebcause what's the point, and what if he gets clingy, and I need my space, and blah blah blah.

Unrelated: Livejournal turns your loaction that you type in into a link. Apparently it thinks I'm somewhere in Texas. Not even close, LJ~

Now. I am determined to get to bed on time tonight! With that, I am off to go set out my things for tomorrow, grab a snack, and get to bed. Catch you on the flip side!

-N.E.